"Parenting" Give your child a sweet home.

A twelve year old child, who had just finished his elementary school graduation ceremony and was about to enter another phase of his life, chose to jump from the sixteenth floor to end his life because of family disharmony.

I am saddened and terrified by this news, as suicide has jumped to the number one cause of death among teenagers, far surpassing accidental deaths, and the age of depression in Taiwan has dropped to thirteen. Recently, people have been holding up big signs on the street saying "Give the kids a break! The sign "Give the children a break! I think "spare the child" is not only in terms of schoolwork, don't force him to repeat exercises day and night; in terms of relationship, we should not use the child as a punching bag in a husband and wife's quarrels or as a bargaining chip in a divorce negotiation.

"Give your child a normal environment to grow up in."

Our country's divorce rate has gradually caught up with that of Europe and the United States, with 168 couples divorcing every day. I always think that marriage is a promise, and cheating on one's partner is a betrayal of trust, which should be shamed. There are always more beautiful flowers and sweeter fruits in the world, the pursuit of which is endless, and people should be responsible for their own choices. The stability and harmony of the family is the basic condition for the growth of children. When there are already children, couples should try their best to adapt to each other and give their children a normal growing environment.

The importance of family can be seen in the fact that in 1989, the highest score on the U.S. Scholastic Aptitude Test (SAT) fell in South Dakota. South Dakota is the state with the lowest teacher salaries in the nation and the eighth lowest allocation of educational resources per child. So, the results caught the attention of scholars, and some research was done.

It was found that the reason for its top ranking is that the state has the lowest divorce rate, strong family ties and also, it maintains traditional values. In other words, the success of education does not lie in the hardware, but in the parents, teachers, and social climate.

Divorce is not necessarily bad for children, but it is mostly bad. Couples can't fight over money or feelings. Love is not bread and butter, and as the saying goes, "poor couples have a lot of sorrows", but we have also heard that "a husband and wife who are of one heart and one mind can be as beneficial as gold", and that should be even sweeter when there are people who work together on the hard road of struggle.

The materialistic desire of human beings is a bottomless pit, not to mention that all feelings are comparative and vary according to one's state of mind at the time, so do not sacrifice your feelings for material things. Most importantly, the family atmosphere in childhood and the intimate relationship between the child and his/her parents will seriously affect the child's mental and physical health in the future.

"Childhood affects lifelong health".

In 1997, two professors at Harvard University in the United States published a shocking research report. They found that they were able to predict the health of freshmen entering Harvard in the 1950s thirty-five years later from a psychological questionnaire they filled out at the time of their enrollment.

Those who tick with the mother is not close to the child, in middle age 91% have heart disease, gastric ulcers, alcoholism, hypertension, asthma and other diseases; and close to the mother's relationship with the people, only 45% have these problems; tick with the father and mother are not close to their own children who grew up alone, the rate of disease is surprisingly high as high as one hundred percent. That is to say, the warmth of the family or not, on the psychological resistance of the child after growing up, physical health, has such a huge impact.

The definition of "warmth" is subjective, not in terms of money, nor in terms of round-the-clock care, as long as the child feels that his parents care about him and that he can find them when he needs to talk to them, that's enough. This sense of security, that "when the sky falls, there are parents to take the lead," is a feeling of happiness that no amount of money can buy. It is an important spiritual pillar for the child in the process of growing up, and it is also a gift that parents can give to the child as long as they are willing to do so.

Nowadays, many parents give their children to Filipino maids to bring them up. However, a child only has one childhood and grows up once, giving him a warm family will make him have confidence in himself and hope in life.

"Life's greatest asset."

Sidney Poitier was America's first black actor to win an Academy Award, and last year the Oscars honored him with a Lifetime Achievement Award. He attributes his success to a happy childhood and the unconditional support of his family. Growing up in the Bahamas, his childhood was characterized by the sound of the ocean, his parents' conversations, and the laughter of his siblings. Whenever he encountered unreasonable treatment and was feeling down, these childhood voices would cheer him up and make him try again, and finally he got a chance to perform. When people see his acting skills, they forget about his skin color, and he got a golden statue award.

A happy family is the greatest asset in life and the sweetest memory in old age. For the sake of your children as well as yourself, please work together to build a sweet family!

Text/Professor Hong Lan