[Parenting] Children love to complain.

"It is in the nature of man to be active, and it is also in the nature of children to complain!

I think this mom already felt like fainting when she read T. Grace's answer! Take it easy! Be patient and read T. Grace's full explanation.

For children, "love complaint" is a very natural thing, it is a communication channel for children to get in touch with the big world from their own small world when they are developing their language. Adults can learn about children's thinking patterns from children's love of complaining, what children are exposed to, how children react to things they encounter, and what is in their minds and how they react.

Adults think it's a pain for children to complain, but you know, the time for children to say what they want to say, regardless, is around 3 to 10 years old, and after that, there are not many chances for children to be willing to talk about big and small things, so that you can understand, analyze, and guide them.

The first thing to do is to look at how the children feel about it. Children love to complain because of the following psychological factors:

1. Maintaining a sense of justice
This is a kind of love of complaining that sticks to the rules. They accept all the rules they receive from adults without question, and they even intend to practise them, so when their siblings, classmates, or friends do something wrong, they immediately practice the behavior of "telling adults", and make it their duty to maintain the rules.

2. Jealousy
Cannot accept the love complaint that others are better than me. It usually happens when a child feels that his or her love and attention has been taken away from him or her, and feels that his or her world has been divided up by other children. At this time, no matter what a sibling or a classmate or a friend in the eyes of the child does, he or she will be targeted and then sued for no reason, no right or wrong, but only to get the adult's attention again, and to get back to his or her own scene and turf.

3. A natural low-profile ostrich
It's a kind of tattletale that doesn't socialize with other kids. When another child is pestering mom or dad or an adult for a lot of attention and can't do anything about it, he or she gets angry with himself or herself and doesn't know how to deal with the problem with any kind of skill, so he or she instinctively joins in with the tattletale to express his or her anger.

4. Too bored to do anything
The child who has nothing to do and loves to sue. The original is a small quarrel with each other, or only one of the parties wants to find someone else to play with them, but accidentally the gunfire, irritating the other children, turned into a love of complaint competition.

5. Being unfairly bullied
This is a kind of revenge love complaint. It's really about being verbally or violently attacked by a sibling, classmate, or friend, and following the guidance of parents and adults, and wanting the bad guy to be sanctioned, and wanting to be supported and helped.